compacting yourself
against morning cold
gazing at the window behind us
its garden reflections
yesterday was early Spring this reversal jars
yet you choose to keep me company
let us go inside leaving the garden
to dream a while longer of warmth to come
#awakeaugust day 16
Also written for dVerse Quadrille #14: jar
(A quadrille is exactly 44 words, excluding title. I also wanted to experiment with unpunctuated couplets.)
I like your lack of punctuation here, Rosemary, giving it a free-flow of thought, perhaps just exactly like a cat would think. :) I am craving your cold morning. It's ridiculously hot here, even ridiculously early.
ReplyDeleteWhereas I would love some heat, lol.
DeleteI like the structure of this piece - the short lines flow like thoughts in one's mind. Perhaps even a cat as De said above. Well written. It's been hot here in NJ as well, thought I'm not complaining. I rather be hot than cold.
ReplyDeleteThank you. And me too!
DeleteCute -- dreaming of the warm to come. How nice.
ReplyDeleteI like how the cat features in this poem. They seem so separate from this jarring world.
ReplyDeleteI think you do have some warmth already in that shared moment.
ReplyDeleteLovely! One of the most peaceful calm things to see: a cat curled up in the sun. :)
ReplyDeleteLove the intensity of longing here in this poem.. oh to feel the warmth of summer again :D beautiful! ❤
ReplyDeleteLots of love,
Sanaa
I love this, you and the cat dreaming of future warmth. It is 107F here today. I'd gladly trade with you if only you would let me rub Selene. I miss my cat. Such moments are so precious.
ReplyDeleteIt would be whether Selene would let you! But she is much more at ease with new people now.
DeleteBeautiful - it made me smile!
ReplyDeleteI could feel the warmth in your words, not only of weather but of friendship with a sweet kitty.
ReplyDeleteI like the image of the garden dreaming of warmth
ReplyDeleteWell done! The lack of punctuation left it a bit ambiguous as to who/what was doing the dreaming, but I did mean the garden. :)
DeleteAwwee how adorable this is. <3
ReplyDeleteLove! conspiring not to wake the garden ...
ReplyDeleteI like how you put your poem into couplets...each one telling a bit more of the story. I also like that Selene chose to stay in the garden in spite of the coolness and that the garden was left to dream of warmth to come...sweet.
ReplyDeleteNo friend quite like a cat, is there?
ReplyDeleteAh yes, the change in weather can definitely be 'jarring.' For both human AND cat!
ReplyDeleteWonderfully presented, Rosemary. I wish you warmth!
ReplyDelete