one high note
then a few more
hesitant
brief piping of a recorder
in the hands of the child
across the road
suddenly stopped
a small music
yet full of hope
Written for Friday Writings #128 at Poets and Storytellers United, where we are invited to write about something small. I decided to write mine in the small form I've been playing with lately: textu (160 characters exactly, including title and spaces).
I love how you use this form..it really crystallises your work and paints a wonderful picture- Jae
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jae. I must say I'm loving it, and like many things it gets easier with practice.
DeleteChildren take things as they come. Do they know good from bad?
ReplyDelete.
Jim
I know that sound. May be the beginning of a new virtuoso or a long, summer assault on the ear, haha. I like your slice of community life.
ReplyDeleteIt's from memory – and the long summer assault was what happened, lol! The same few notes over and over! Yet in the beginning that sweet moment I've never forgotten. (He grew up to go into the Navy.)
DeleteIt's from memory – and the long summer assault was what happened, lol! The same few notes over and over! Yet in the beginning that sweet moment I've never forgotten. (He grew up to go into the Navy.)
DeleteThis works really well and i love the textu
ReplyDeleteThanks, Alan. I think I'm starting to get the hang of the textu. (Grin.)
DeletePerfect. I felt right there. Hope like a birdsong.
ReplyDeleteLovely comment, ta.
DeleteGoogle's cookie craziness appears to be spreading. We're all logged in but, if we''re not accepting cookies, some versions of Blogspot claim to think we're logged out!
ReplyDeleteAnyway, nice that the child's tootling is hopeful, and especially nice that the neighbor feels good enough to appreciate the hopefulness!
Pris cilla King
Yes, Google Blogger (and Google in general) can be extremely frustrating!
DeleteThank you for the empathetic words.
Something about your poem brought tears to my eyes, a lump in my throat .... it is a precious bit of poetry.
ReplyDeleteAwww, thank you!!
DeleteThis is a "moment" type of poetry. It paints a very brief but vivid image. I can relate this to my neighbour's child playing her piano. I love this poem. And as a textu too. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, my friend. I'm glad you love it.
DeleteYour poem puts me in that place and time, hearing those brief notes and feeling a sense of possibility in my heart. Hope you are well, Rosemary.
ReplyDeleteAh, I'm glad it did that for you, Barb. I'm pretty well for an old girl, thanks. Hoping you are too.
DeleteThis really captured the spirit of the prompt both in theme and structure. I really love how well you captured the moment here.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Rommy. And for the opportunity the prompt provided.
DeleteOne small, hopeful moment captured perfectly.
ReplyDeleteIt was actually quite a few years ago now, but it so caught me that somehow I've always remembered. This is not the first time I've written of it, but maybe this one works the best.
Delete